Sunday, May 29, 2016

TWO BIG FAT LIES WE TELL OURSELVES

A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.” —Mark Twain

No matter the size of a lie, it’s a lie. While there is only one stage of truth, there are three degrees of lying: white lies, fibs, and blatant untruths. The difference between a white lie and a fib is shades of grey People often cross their fingers as they stretch the truth in the form of a fib. The difference between a fib and a blatant lie is a lie deliberately communicates false information.
I can deal with liars if they always lie. It’s the people, who skate between truth, white lies, fibs, and blatant lies that cause me a problem.
Faced with a business or career opportunity, people often opt to buy into one of the two biggest self-defeating lies. They convince themselves they are 1. Too young to step out or, 2. They are too old to change. As experience proves, either excuse is a big fat lie. The source for both of these lies is fear. When a person—young or old—says, “I’m afraid to make a decision, you’re listening to a risk-avoider and a person afraid of success. It’s unfortunate, but they will achieve their goal.
The problem with self-lying is it is easier to lie to ourselves than it is to others. It is amazing how complete the delusion is that one is too young or too old to achieve success. By not venturing, people have an alibi: I am too young, or I am too old. The purpose of life is to live your dream and help others live their dream. To do that, you have to do those things that bring you closer to fulfilling the dream.
A great deal of time can be invested in avoidance of opportunity when the need for a decision is obvious. Malcolm Gladwell, in his book, “Blink”, writes, “Decisions made very quickly can be every bit as good as decisions made cautiously and deliberately.”
The avoidance of making a decision often comes back to haunt. The failure to step up, make a decision, and accept the challenge strengthens our most fatal tendency—the acceptance of “what is, is.”  People are better to act on the advice of Robin Williams in the movie, “Dead Poets Society,” “Carpe diem. Seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary.” It’s hard to understand why more people don’t put the “extra” in extraordinary.

I’m not young and don’t consider myself too old so, this morning, I made a decision and ate an extra biscuit at breakfast. Eating the additional biscuit isn’t a part of my dieting program. But it was good. So rather than lie to myself, I fibbed.

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