Thursday, June 9, 2016

TWO BLACK IN-CONTROL STONES

I carry two black stone in the right front pocket of my pants. I have, since 2000. Every time I retrieve change or my car keys, I come in contact with the stones. I call them “in-charge” stones. Why two stones and not one or three. My wife and I have two children. Children are costly but a great investment for my old age.

My son served in the Army for 20 years, much of the time flying AH-64D Longbow Apache helicopters. These are expensive aircraft and the two person flying team risk their lives in flying them. A simple but great regulation the Army has for ensuring that the two pilot team know who’s in charge of piloting the aircraft is called, “The three-way change of control.” If the first pilot wants to hand off the piloting to the other pilot, he says, “Joe, you are in control.” Joe responds and says, “I am in control.” Then the first pilot replies, “You are in control.” No room for doubt, excuse, or error. There are two lives and a $20-million aircraft involved. The two aviators know who is in control of flying the helicopter.

I used this three-way change of control often in my business career. When I assigned a project or task, I always finished with, “Jake, you are in control.” Jake responded, “Wayne, I am in control.” When I replied, “Jake, you are in control,” there was no room for doubt, excuse, or error.

As for the stones and their final disposition, I plan to include in my will one additional simple comment that makes it unique. In this final act, I will remind my children of the principles of the stone.

FOCUS ON WHAT’S IMPORTANT. The one stone reminds to stay focused on the one main thing that makes a difference. Always focus on results.

BE COMMITTED. There is an order to commitment. Commit to your faith, your family, and your organization—in that order. This order of commitment is a distinguishing mark of a person with integrity

BE THE BEST YOU CAN BE. Your stone is not the biggest, brightest, toughest or most costly. But, it is perfection for this stone. Don’t strive to be the best and don’t settle for less than your best.

THE TWO SIDES OF THE STONE STAND FOR THE TWO KEY COMPONENTS OF SUCCESS.  Show up for work and work. Do this and you will be in the top 10 percent of the employed. Many people quit looking for work once they have a job.

AUTHORITY IS TRANSFERABLE BUT RESPONSIBILITY IS NOT. Though a teammate is piloting the aircraft, you remain responsible for the safety of the crew and the aircraft. When delegating a task to an employee or family member, you are only assigning the task to them. You have the responsibility for follow-up to ensure the implementation of the assignment.

THE STONE IS SOLID AND PERMANENT. But pressure, the wind, and water can wear it down. In life, change and competition work to wear you down. Continuous learning and training provide protection against the weathering.


These two stones, I carry will be the most important thing my son and daughter inherit. Oh, they will get a little money if my wife and I haven’t spent it. But the money doesn’t carry the memories; the stones do. You see, every time I held those stones over the past many years, I thought of my two children. They are in control of their lives and is shows in their personal leadership in business and with their families.

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